Wednesday, October 21, 2009

45 Days till Shelby

How to blog, unplanned, unscripted?

No care for the entertainment value of my words.

Quite frankly, I have learned over the years of half-assed blogging and posting on news/ social websites that people, in general don't give a flying shit about what I or anyone actually has to say. Everyone just wants to be heard, to have their own fucked up perspectives immortalized and justified by those around them. "Love me!!!!" the weak majority screams!

So here i am. Me, no sugar coating, no ready whip with a big luscious efing cherry on top (stem included for aesthetic purposes only). Ok, me with the fuckin cherry dangling by it's stem from my capped front toofs.

Maraschino cherries rock, just not in large quantities. It is true, deniers be damned.

I am a soldier, a husband, a father, a brother, an employee, a tenent, a member of a social group, a student, and last, but never least a child of God. Secondary; a leader, a follower, a winner, a loser, a fighter and a flyter.

The military. As a member of our armed forces I am a very small part of a very large working whole. I represent honor, strength and integrity. This is my contribution to the community of which i abide, the assessment of my value as a citizen aside from the taxes I reluctantly pay to pad the pockets of our thieving and despicable leaders. Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. So really it isn't their fault, for they are merely human, right? Then again, our lowliest soldier is held to a much higher moral standard than the assholes who send him or her into war, hooah sirs. Have a drink in your ivory towers on us, the liberation machine. Don't choke or drown though, please, for we need you to procreate so that your seed can further rape the masses for generations to come while informing us of your important contributions to the society of which you exploit.

College education. My avoidance of the accrual of student loans due to the lowly economic status I was born into and my escape from idiocy and Alzheimer's in my elder years. I will always be a student, it was engraved in my psyche many years ago by Socrates or Plato? I have read so much by so many and taken what rang true while discarding the BS, that to differentiate between who said what isn't a worthy endeavor. Never an important aspect of learning for me for I would rather attain the wisdom of concepts, than to merely display three or four syllable words lacking understanding to better represent the institutions of higher learning. Look like a dumbass, be as wise as a sage I always say.

5 years of bible college and I am on the Buddhist path to purify my mind, my body. I have always felt a natural bent for the Buddhist path, that I can remember anyway. The only influence I can recall from memory was a taoist philosophy book I picked up after I had been in the Navy for a short while. I also studied psychology to better fuck with those who attempted to fuck with me. To better engage in any endeavor one should become overly knowledgeable on the subject matter at hand. This instills confidence and better arms the participant with the ability to wage a tactically and technically proficient attack on his or her opponents.

Enough with the cynical side.

On a lighter note, I love being a soldier, a husband, a father and a student. An employee, not so much, but the bills getting paid every once in a while is a necessity, right?

No other institution on Earth provides the comradeship that the military does. I feel so much more comfortable around the disciplined, than the unruly masses. I love the uniform, the equipment, the smell of gunpowder and MREs.

I am the luckiest man I know with the wife I was blessed to marry and the children I have been blessed to partake in raising. My wife and kids rock, seriously. The family I was born into isn't worth the shit paper they blow their noses on, but my wife and kids? Cooler than ready whip.

At some point I hope to vomit the bad and leave only the good. For hatred is a wasted emotion with no purpose other than to make one look as a fool pissing into the wind. Cynicism is a waste of intellect and breathe, but does have it's entertainment value now doesn't it.

Compassion is the most important attribute of the follower of the way, for a heart filled with compassion empowers the mind to bestow blessings of love and goodwill to the world, thereby producing good karma for all to partake.

The prevailing thought on my mind;

I honestly never thought I would actually go to war as a citizen soldier. I desired the experience as a young man for war is a major player in the history of the human race. War has always been with us and soldiers are on the front lines of societal change. Only a select few have the balls to experience the horrors, the triumphs, the adrenaline soaked power of true purposeful, justified destructive force (though, war is never justified when there is the possibility of diplomacy, only a moraless maniac would choose war as the first and only option). I have never wanted to kill, don't get me wrong. Hell, as I mature in age the idea of having to kill as a cost for experiencing war seems less and less attractive as time goes on. I only pray my time in the war zone as a soldier is a time met with opportunities for humanitarianism and not direct combat. Hope for the best and plan for the worst, no matter the mission a soldier is always 11B. We will watch each other's backs with eyes wide open, no doubt.

This is all for now.

peace and compassion

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